Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Back and...Better Then Ever??

Hello Again! I've been on hiatus from blogging for what, 2 weeks now? I've still been here enjoying reading what everyone's had to say but I've held off on what I've needed to say just because I felt like reflection was best at this point. I know that losing this weight will not only make me healthier but much happier; however, I somehow cannot seem to convince myself of that when I'm sitting on the couch watching a good show or at 5am when my alarm goes off and without second thought I reset it for 5:50. I'm drinking 2-3 sodas a day and I've had so much McDonald's in the past week I'm considering making a sequel to "Super Size Me". So I've layed out a "baby-steps" game plan because that's the only way I'm ever going to get this ball rolling.

1. I will be drinking 3L of water a day. This will be replacing my disgusting soda habit that I've formed and overall make me feel and look better. I even bought this really cute little water bottle to help inspire me to drink more. (I'm at work now, but I'll post a picture of it when I get home) The water bottle holds about 1/2 L so if I drink about 6-7 of these a day I will hit my 3L a day goal. A good thing about it only holding 1/2 L at a time (I'm trying to think positive here) is that the water fountain at my work is about a 2 minute walk away because it is on the other side of the building. I figure I'll get in a little bit of exercise walking over there a couple times a day.

2. I'm done with fast food. Yep, you read right. I know that you aren't supposed to cut anything out of your life completely like that but really what is fast food good for? It makes me feel sick afterwards because everything is so greasy and fried, it's expensive and it obviously hasn't done anything relatively good to my waistline. It's disgusting and without a doubt my worst enemy. I don't need it in my life nor do I really want it. It's fast and convenient hence the reason I turn to it so much.

3. My eating is getting re-vamped. I did really well for the week or 2 that I stuck to 6 meals a day including healthy snacks. The problem came when I felt like I didn't have enough money to go grocery shopping so I skipped for a week and everything else fell apart. Ironically, I had enough money to eat fast food, just not buy myself anything healthy. Funny how that works huh? Basically it was easier to drive through versus cooking a meal and planning everything out. Well I'm going shopping again and getting lots of veggies, fruits and lean chicken. (I've discovered I'm not really a fan of turkey) I've decided to try to incorporate some of the ideas of the raw food diet into mine. The raw vegetable pasta looks amazingly delicious so I can't wait to try that one :-)

4. Mm the dreaded exercise. I'm trying to get my mind back to how I felt about 2 years ago when I lost 40 pounds and exercised almost everyday. I was sooo happy and looked/felt wonderful. I enjoyed my nightly trips to the gym and didn't mind the exercise. If only I could get in that mind frame again I would be golden. It's no longer an option as to whether or not I get up at 5am. I will get up and I'm not going to let me stop myself any longer. That's what I've been doing for 20 years and look where it got me. I also would like to start walking nightly with my mom. (she walks about 2 miles a night) Me and my friend are starting a weekly walk around the lake (about 14 miles) and every Tuesday night I exercise for 45 minutes with my step mom. When I read everything I'm going to do it looks really good: Circuit train in the morning with weights, cardio at night and a nice long walk on Sunday mornings. Now if all of that actually happens I will be surprised to say the least. But why? Why should I be sooo surprised for being successful? That's a big problem that I'm having. I don't believe in myself and by not believing in myself I'm not really letting anyone (including me) down by not losing weight. So today is the start of believing and knowing that I can do this.

Blah, I hate writing all these "today's the day" and "this is what I'm going to do" posts because I feel like I should only have to write one of those and that would be it. I would stick to it the first time and just be writing posts about how amazing I feel and what I've been doing and all my progress. I guess if I wasn't struggling with this I probably wouldn't have turned to blogging huh? Haha anyways have a wonderful Tuesday everyone!!

...I still miss Biggest Loser :-(

1 comment:

  1. I like your new attitude, so this next comment isn't mean to sound negative, or unsupportive :-), but I would suggest that you might be going a little too far the other way with the exercise.

    Don't forget a good long walk is fine, but if you're not recovered enough to train properly early doors, you could quite find you're struggling to do it, because of things like sleep issues rapid fatigue etc etc, and you don't want to overtrain, as that will hurt your progress soon into the regime, because you're training twice a day, as that's entering into figure / fitness competition training territory.

    I would humbly suggest, you could do something like this as an example.

    Day 1 Weights

    Day 2 Cardio

    Day 3 Weights

    Day 4 Day off

    Day 5 Cardio

    Day 6 Weights

    Day 7 Day off.

    Adequate rest time, and not having the two days off back to back, eating into progress a bit.

    I know it must be hard ot get started on a journey like this, and I certainly wouldtt' be so rude as to come here, and give the third degree about this and that, as you behave like a Lady, and as such have earned and deserve my respect and gentlemanly attitude.

    So I will wish ou luck again. I do want this to work for you, and I think you're a great person, who just needs more time to develop some of the emotional and mental facets, and to keep believing more in yourself as a person.

    Take care and never feel anything less than proud of yourself for saying these things. I cna understand it's not easy to say I did this, I didn't do that, as I would think it's like saying, hay I'm a screw up of sorts, but you're nothing like that as all, you're just someone who is determined to make this work, not one of those who go to Gym in January, then just never go again after 3-4 weeks.

    I can see how much you want this, and I want you to succeed, becasue I want you to feel truly happy about yourself as a person. I do believe you're worth that, and that smile is an illuminating thing, and you deserve to shine like that all the time.

    I hope things will work out for you Jemma. Be strong chin up and no worries okay. It WILL get easier to manage with time, it's just a few teething troubles, like many in your situation go through.

    :-) :-).